What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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