What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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