What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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