What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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