What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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