What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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