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What do you call a young army?
Infantry.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date
but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?
A screwdriver.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?
Meet Patty.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?
Only three. The rest are true stories.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"
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