What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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