What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.

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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.

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