What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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