What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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