What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!

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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.

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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board

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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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