What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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