What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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