What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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