What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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