What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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