What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.

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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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