What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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