What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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