What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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