What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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