What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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