What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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