What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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