What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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