What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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