What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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