What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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