What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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