What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy

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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.

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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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