What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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