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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?
Ant-elopes!
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Why did the cow cross the road?
Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What does the toast wear to bed?
Jammies!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?
To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
It needed to be trimmed.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?
It needed a root canal.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?
Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?
Discrimination.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?
In a snow bank!
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