What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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