What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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