What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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