What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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