What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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