What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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