What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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