What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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