What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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