What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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