What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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