What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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