What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.

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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.

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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.

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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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