What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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