What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore

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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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