What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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