What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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