What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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