What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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