What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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