What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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