What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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