What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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