What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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