What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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