What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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