What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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