What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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