What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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