What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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