What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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