What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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