What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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