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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?
A pair of Re-Bachs.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.
But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?
Snaked.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the dog say to the flea?
Stop bugging me
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?
The Elfabet.
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