What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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