What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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