What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.

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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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