What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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