What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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