What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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