What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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