What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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