What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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