What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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