What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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