What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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