What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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