What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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