What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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