What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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