What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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