What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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