What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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