What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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