What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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