What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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