What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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