What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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