What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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