What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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