What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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