What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.

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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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