What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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