What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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