What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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