What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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