What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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