What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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