What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.

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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

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