What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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