What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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