What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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