What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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