What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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