What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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