What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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