What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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