What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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