What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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