What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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