What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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