What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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