What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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