What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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