What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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