What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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