What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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