What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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