What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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