What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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