What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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