What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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