What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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