What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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