What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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