What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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