What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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