What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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