What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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