What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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