What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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