What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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