What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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