What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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