What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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