What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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