What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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