What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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