What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.

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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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