What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks

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