What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.

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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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