What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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