What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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