What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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