What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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A seal walks into a club...
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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