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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?
A Flat Miner
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?
Quark!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.
That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?
The batter.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?
Ice cream.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?
O I C U R M T
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
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