What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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