What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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