What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!


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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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