What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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