What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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