What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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