"Let me see your birth certificate".
or
1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
or
When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
or
10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
or
A Chair!
or