What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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