What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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