What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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