What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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