What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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