What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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