What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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