What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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