What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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