What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.

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