What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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