What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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