What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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