What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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