What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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