What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed

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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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