What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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