What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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