What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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