What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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