What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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