What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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