What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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