What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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