What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".

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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon


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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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