What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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