What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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