What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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