What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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