What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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