What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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