What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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