What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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