What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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