What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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