What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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