What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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