What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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