What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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