What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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