What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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