What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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