What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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