What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.

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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.

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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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