What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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