What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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