What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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