What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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