What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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