What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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