What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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