What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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