What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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