What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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