What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.

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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''

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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

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