What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy

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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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