What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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