What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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