What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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