What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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