What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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