What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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