What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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