What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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