What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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