What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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