What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.

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