What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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