What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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