What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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