What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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