What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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