What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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