What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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