What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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