What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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