What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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