What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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