What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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