What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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