What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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