What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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