What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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