What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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