What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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