What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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