What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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