What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.


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What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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