What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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