What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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