What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.

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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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